I went to the bio-photon treatment facility for the second time last week. The lady who was at first a bit suspicious of me, concerning my psi-abilities, was now a bit more relaxed. She tested again my bio-photon emission, and was very surprised by the results.
She said to me, do you know you can do exactly what this machine does now? If these readings are correct. You have the ability to heal people! That is rare! I hardly ever encounter readings like that. She asked me if I still wanted the bio-photon energy. I said... Sure..it feels good! While the computer was sending this light through my hands...I was looking at this lady...thinking... I like you!
Suddenly she noticed a tinkling sensation in her stomache and it was crawling up to her throat, then to her head. She said to me: Are you doing that? I just asked her back: Do you like the feeling?
She awnsered yes! And as she tried to find words to describe it. I said: Feels like strong fresh mints! Exactly! she said! Almost a cold breeze...but not unpleasant...weird though!
At the end of the session she gave me a big hug, and thanked me. Instantly I was not a patient anymore, but a long lost friend! I was wondering why...it was her equipment that helped me improve my balance. And I gave her something in return! Just positive energy!
She was suddenly very happy and cheerfull!
"Who helps the docter?"
2007/08/23
2007/08/14
Lucid Dream or Nightmare...Continued 2
I have been in the area where my earlier nightmare actually took place. I located two spots that were also connected to this dream. I went to the police station in that district and told them what had happend to me earlier and that I might be able to tell them more about this. They asked me for a full report with all details, and I have sent it to them. Since it's a police case now, I have to leave it at this for now. The police were very kind, and asked if they could contact me if needed. I agreed on that.
2007/08/08
Lucid Dream or Nightmare - Continued
One night about two years ago I had a very strange dream. I was in a village standing on the sidewalk looking accros the street there was a white/grey house behind a green hague, and a fence of iron bars. As I crossed the street... voice inside me told me I was going to the house of a serial killer. I thought...it had to be something like a museum-house of a Jack the Ripper figure.
I walked toward a gate that was opened. And followed a stone path in the garden. The path bowed to the right. On both sides there was beautyfull green grass. And the house had a side entrance, with a stone/concete step. I walked in...but the house was empty. There was a small hall before entering the livingroom. In the hall there were tiles and the livingroom had a wooden floor. Suddenly it got very dark, and a blue light lit up blood stains. I got scared. And walked out to the hall. Suddenly there were two pairs of green rubber boots. I turned around and looked at the livingroom...suddenly all the furniture was there. Carpets on the floor, sofa and chairs...everything! Like a family lived there. It freaked me out! And I went back to the garden.
A young looking man with dark eyes and curly hair was mowing the lawn on my right. He looked at me like I was an intruder and like he wanted to tell me I should not tell this to anyone. As I looked to my left, there was a grave like hole dug in the green gras. I speeded up my pase, trying not to run... And outside the gate I started looking for a busstop or trainstation. (Strange I have a car in real life...I hardly ever use public transport.) I started running up the street quite desperate, and came to a wall of a monestary. It seemed an endless wall! I got the feeling there would be a swimmingpool nearby. But I got lost running in to this hughe forrest! Then I woke up. With the feeling like I was running from a serial killer, my heart pounded... It was just a nightmare. I told my husband about this strange dream and left it for what is was... a nightmare.
Two weeks later...I completely forgot about the dream. I walked indoors to get something to drink and the television is on. Somehow the news caught my attention, hearing a serial killer was arrested. I looked up and saw the house on the television, in that street. This serial killer worked as a forester and gardener. He picked up victims (young girls) at bus stations and trainstations, one of the girls was in a convent-school (monestary).
I stood there as nailed to the ground! My nightmare, was not just a nightmare...It was real!
It was his house that I had seen! I had been there in my dreams! And this man claimed, on television, he was even worse than the famous killer of his country! He wanted to be like a "Jack the Ripper" kind of person! It realy freaked me out! But one thing was wrong...he was not the young gardner that I had seen. And there were two pair of green rubber boots there...
I called out to my husband. He saw me shaking all over. And asked what was wrong. I told him and he replied I should call the police! I just stood there and said: "And tell them what? That I had a dream about this? That's insane! And how do I explain I know all these things when I was not even there? Police use common sense! And there is no way to explain this with common sense! It would at the least make me suspicious!" But my husband replied: "You have an aliby! This happened 300km away! And everyone here can confirm you haven't left this area!
I was not convinced! And very scared and confused about this all! My husband kept telling me to get this of my chest. After nine months I was ready to give an anonymous tip to the police.
Not knowing if it was going to be a waistbin file or not, because it wasn't in my country.
Atleast I had done something...but was it enough?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tomorrow I'll start on a journey, to the country where this nightmare actually took place. I will attempt to find the house and check if I can find out some more about this. I'm not sure where it will lead me. I know the connections between me and the dream is the victims profile. When I was their age...I was alot like them! Especially one girl's profile matches with me. That is the only connection I've got.
I do not have an address of the place. I've got a vague clue about the town, but I'm not sure. Hopefully I'll get some awnsers on why I had the dream, and what I'm supposed to do with it. I feel strong enough for this confrontation, but it also feels like going to a "war-zone". Not really something you look forward to. And not knowing what to expect.
I walked toward a gate that was opened. And followed a stone path in the garden. The path bowed to the right. On both sides there was beautyfull green grass. And the house had a side entrance, with a stone/concete step. I walked in...but the house was empty. There was a small hall before entering the livingroom. In the hall there were tiles and the livingroom had a wooden floor. Suddenly it got very dark, and a blue light lit up blood stains. I got scared. And walked out to the hall. Suddenly there were two pairs of green rubber boots. I turned around and looked at the livingroom...suddenly all the furniture was there. Carpets on the floor, sofa and chairs...everything! Like a family lived there. It freaked me out! And I went back to the garden.
A young looking man with dark eyes and curly hair was mowing the lawn on my right. He looked at me like I was an intruder and like he wanted to tell me I should not tell this to anyone. As I looked to my left, there was a grave like hole dug in the green gras. I speeded up my pase, trying not to run... And outside the gate I started looking for a busstop or trainstation. (Strange I have a car in real life...I hardly ever use public transport.) I started running up the street quite desperate, and came to a wall of a monestary. It seemed an endless wall! I got the feeling there would be a swimmingpool nearby. But I got lost running in to this hughe forrest! Then I woke up. With the feeling like I was running from a serial killer, my heart pounded... It was just a nightmare. I told my husband about this strange dream and left it for what is was... a nightmare.
Two weeks later...I completely forgot about the dream. I walked indoors to get something to drink and the television is on. Somehow the news caught my attention, hearing a serial killer was arrested. I looked up and saw the house on the television, in that street. This serial killer worked as a forester and gardener. He picked up victims (young girls) at bus stations and trainstations, one of the girls was in a convent-school (monestary).
I stood there as nailed to the ground! My nightmare, was not just a nightmare...It was real!
It was his house that I had seen! I had been there in my dreams! And this man claimed, on television, he was even worse than the famous killer of his country! He wanted to be like a "Jack the Ripper" kind of person! It realy freaked me out! But one thing was wrong...he was not the young gardner that I had seen. And there were two pair of green rubber boots there...
I called out to my husband. He saw me shaking all over. And asked what was wrong. I told him and he replied I should call the police! I just stood there and said: "And tell them what? That I had a dream about this? That's insane! And how do I explain I know all these things when I was not even there? Police use common sense! And there is no way to explain this with common sense! It would at the least make me suspicious!" But my husband replied: "You have an aliby! This happened 300km away! And everyone here can confirm you haven't left this area!
I was not convinced! And very scared and confused about this all! My husband kept telling me to get this of my chest. After nine months I was ready to give an anonymous tip to the police.
Not knowing if it was going to be a waistbin file or not, because it wasn't in my country.
Atleast I had done something...but was it enough?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tomorrow I'll start on a journey, to the country where this nightmare actually took place. I will attempt to find the house and check if I can find out some more about this. I'm not sure where it will lead me. I know the connections between me and the dream is the victims profile. When I was their age...I was alot like them! Especially one girl's profile matches with me. That is the only connection I've got.
I do not have an address of the place. I've got a vague clue about the town, but I'm not sure. Hopefully I'll get some awnsers on why I had the dream, and what I'm supposed to do with it. I feel strong enough for this confrontation, but it also feels like going to a "war-zone". Not really something you look forward to. And not knowing what to expect.
2007/08/07
Social matters
Last week I went to a bio-photon treatment facility for the first time.
Hoping they would be able to get my immune-system back on track. 'Cause whenever someone sneezes...I got the flu! And hopefully it would also to keep me to the ground. I'm a mind-person and tend to leave my body for what it is. Leaving me unconnected to the "here and now"!
The lady working with the bio-photon equipment read my medical record and the complaints that no medical doctor was able to solve yet! She was surprized to see ESP described in it. Then she started to worry...Do you have telepathic-abilities? My awnser was: "Yes, at times I do have telepathic-abilities." Then she asked with some causion: "Are you reading me now?" But I wasn't... so the simple awnser was: "No!" It clearly made her nervous. Her questions made me nervous aswell! Was she suspicious of me? Why?
It made her even more nervous when the mesuring equipment showed I was the most healthiest person she had ever encounterd. I was giving so much energy! Then she asked if I had taken any medication lately...or had been active in sports within the last three days...But no I didn't! Then she asked me to let go the energy and please relax...Finally she got normal readings on her screen!
After the readings, she was looking for a sollution in a book, it wasn't very common so she had to look it up. She found it and wanted to set the computer to send this frequency of bio-photons, but it was not listed in the computer. I just stated: "It's there alright...check for another name for it!" And she found it! It was indeed listed under a slightly different name! "You already knew it was under a different name?! And that it was listed?" "Thank you...that was very helpfull!" she said. "But you probably already knew that!" She subtily remarked! She was clearly unconfortable with me possibly being able to see more than usual stuff.
If my medical report and complaints had not stated ESP and Highly sensitive...she would have believed it was a strange coincedence that I knew the treatment was listed under a slightly different name.
Then she apologized, saying she never met anyone like me before and that she could not imagine what it would be like to be that way! And that being higly sensitive is something most people would love to have! She looked very surprised when I stated that for exactly that reason I'd love to trade places with those people! Thinking: "What am I? A freakshow?"
It's not funny to be treated like a possible threat of exposing someones private life! I have no intention of looking in to those things, and if I accidentally see things, I would not tell or point fingers anyway. Simply because I would not like it if someone else did that to me. I'd like to be helpful with my abilities, and not be treated like a "weird person" in return.
I can imagine, that it makes people feel unconfortable, not knowing wether I can tell things about them or not. Keeping that in mind, it makes me unconfortable telling the truth about myself!
This encounter with the lady, made it clear to me that I should still be carefull, to whom I reveal the abilities. In the past a many people turned away from me for that reason. Atleast I know the friends I have now, have nothing to hide. ;-)
Hoping they would be able to get my immune-system back on track. 'Cause whenever someone sneezes...I got the flu! And hopefully it would also to keep me to the ground. I'm a mind-person and tend to leave my body for what it is. Leaving me unconnected to the "here and now"!
The lady working with the bio-photon equipment read my medical record and the complaints that no medical doctor was able to solve yet! She was surprized to see ESP described in it. Then she started to worry...Do you have telepathic-abilities? My awnser was: "Yes, at times I do have telepathic-abilities." Then she asked with some causion: "Are you reading me now?" But I wasn't... so the simple awnser was: "No!" It clearly made her nervous. Her questions made me nervous aswell! Was she suspicious of me? Why?
It made her even more nervous when the mesuring equipment showed I was the most healthiest person she had ever encounterd. I was giving so much energy! Then she asked if I had taken any medication lately...or had been active in sports within the last three days...But no I didn't! Then she asked me to let go the energy and please relax...Finally she got normal readings on her screen!
After the readings, she was looking for a sollution in a book, it wasn't very common so she had to look it up. She found it and wanted to set the computer to send this frequency of bio-photons, but it was not listed in the computer. I just stated: "It's there alright...check for another name for it!" And she found it! It was indeed listed under a slightly different name! "You already knew it was under a different name?! And that it was listed?" "Thank you...that was very helpfull!" she said. "But you probably already knew that!" She subtily remarked! She was clearly unconfortable with me possibly being able to see more than usual stuff.
If my medical report and complaints had not stated ESP and Highly sensitive...she would have believed it was a strange coincedence that I knew the treatment was listed under a slightly different name.
Then she apologized, saying she never met anyone like me before and that she could not imagine what it would be like to be that way! And that being higly sensitive is something most people would love to have! She looked very surprised when I stated that for exactly that reason I'd love to trade places with those people! Thinking: "What am I? A freakshow?"
It's not funny to be treated like a possible threat of exposing someones private life! I have no intention of looking in to those things, and if I accidentally see things, I would not tell or point fingers anyway. Simply because I would not like it if someone else did that to me. I'd like to be helpful with my abilities, and not be treated like a "weird person" in return.
I can imagine, that it makes people feel unconfortable, not knowing wether I can tell things about them or not. Keeping that in mind, it makes me unconfortable telling the truth about myself!
This encounter with the lady, made it clear to me that I should still be carefull, to whom I reveal the abilities. In the past a many people turned away from me for that reason. Atleast I know the friends I have now, have nothing to hide. ;-)
The Pittfall called Expectations
During RV-training I noticed, I started as a blank sheet! That worked realy well!
Getting useful information about a target was easy! It just happend! But after tree weeks of dayly practice...the hit-rates dropped dramatically! Why? What happend?
After reviewing all my previous sessions, I discovered that after a while I was working with my memory instead of intuïtion. Somehow I was expecting to see something similar to what I had seen before. My mind was combining information from all previous targets. It seemed like my mind was creating it's own expectations. Whitout me even taking notice of that! I still believed I was RV-ing! And simply was loosing my touch. So a continues stream of RV-sessions somehow creates expectations. Similar to the Pavlov-effect! For instance if the previous feed-back was mostly buildings...the mind sets allmost automatically to RV-ing buildings! But that's not RV-ing...it's a memory interference!
Earlier this week I had an interesting conversation with a RV-critic. He stated that the website I was using for practice, might link (parts of) my rv-data to an image and could combine it with the feedback image in the database. Making it look like I was RV-ing. Although I think that is really far-fetched...it can not be completely excluded that he could be right!
I really do not know what script they are using, so to check if I would be able to RV without the computer, my husband and I set up an experiment. He has got plenty of photographs that I have never seen. He went to another room...blindly took a photograph out of a box and put it in a double envelope. So he did not know what the target picture was and neither did I.
I RV-ed this target correctly! We did a total session of six targets that way, and I provided amazing details about the target-pictures.
With the last target, my husband wanted to pull a trick on me. This time he peaked and selected a photograph with nothing but a green blur on it, just to see what the result would be if there was nothing in the picture. Ofcourse he didn't tell me that!
I RV-ed a shape of a tree...green...but not really green like a tree. More like grey-green or army-green. Then I pointed at his back-pack, and said that color! The picture is a blur with that color grey-green. So he took the photograph out of the envelope and held it next to the back-pack! And it was exactly that color! Even the shape I drew, was faintly in the pictures blur.
It pretty much conviced me, that there is nothing wrong with the computerized RV-training sessions on the website! But I was amazed by the target hit-rates in this session! Being used to the computer...it was new for me, to RV that way, and so I was like a blank sheet again! With amazing results!
If it wasn't for the critic...I would not have dicovered this so soon!
And I have to be aware of any expectations I might have about a target, and avoid the Pavlov-effect. These test were very usefull!
Getting useful information about a target was easy! It just happend! But after tree weeks of dayly practice...the hit-rates dropped dramatically! Why? What happend?
After reviewing all my previous sessions, I discovered that after a while I was working with my memory instead of intuïtion. Somehow I was expecting to see something similar to what I had seen before. My mind was combining information from all previous targets. It seemed like my mind was creating it's own expectations. Whitout me even taking notice of that! I still believed I was RV-ing! And simply was loosing my touch. So a continues stream of RV-sessions somehow creates expectations. Similar to the Pavlov-effect! For instance if the previous feed-back was mostly buildings...the mind sets allmost automatically to RV-ing buildings! But that's not RV-ing...it's a memory interference!
Earlier this week I had an interesting conversation with a RV-critic. He stated that the website I was using for practice, might link (parts of) my rv-data to an image and could combine it with the feedback image in the database. Making it look like I was RV-ing. Although I think that is really far-fetched...it can not be completely excluded that he could be right!
I really do not know what script they are using, so to check if I would be able to RV without the computer, my husband and I set up an experiment. He has got plenty of photographs that I have never seen. He went to another room...blindly took a photograph out of a box and put it in a double envelope. So he did not know what the target picture was and neither did I.
I RV-ed this target correctly! We did a total session of six targets that way, and I provided amazing details about the target-pictures.
With the last target, my husband wanted to pull a trick on me. This time he peaked and selected a photograph with nothing but a green blur on it, just to see what the result would be if there was nothing in the picture. Ofcourse he didn't tell me that!
I RV-ed a shape of a tree...green...but not really green like a tree. More like grey-green or army-green. Then I pointed at his back-pack, and said that color! The picture is a blur with that color grey-green. So he took the photograph out of the envelope and held it next to the back-pack! And it was exactly that color! Even the shape I drew, was faintly in the pictures blur.
It pretty much conviced me, that there is nothing wrong with the computerized RV-training sessions on the website! But I was amazed by the target hit-rates in this session! Being used to the computer...it was new for me, to RV that way, and so I was like a blank sheet again! With amazing results!
If it wasn't for the critic...I would not have dicovered this so soon!
And I have to be aware of any expectations I might have about a target, and avoid the Pavlov-effect. These test were very usefull!
2007/08/06
Remote Viewing
Through my interest on the psi-subject and the search for awnsers, I came across an amazing Remote Viewing website and community. At first it appeared to me, there was little difference between spontaneous Extra Sensory Perception and Remote Viewing. But as a newbee, it was clearly explained to me that there is a huge difference!
RV (Remote Viewing) is always double blind. No person knows what the target is, and so it is excluded that the information could have been obtained by any means than ESP. I then argued...but most of the time I do not know what my spontaneous ESP brings me...still I see things that later are confirmed. That is simmilar to RV, isn't it? Still it was not RV, because I had no intention of seeing things! With RV it is about intentional Viewing a Remote and unknown target! Besides RV-ing is done within a Protocol.
And what if I tried RV? Would my spontaneous psi get worse? Or would I be able to control it by practice? None of the RV-er could awnser that question. Some stated, that they became more sensitive after a lot of practice.
I decided I had nothing to loose, and gave it a try! But where do you start...if you have got nothing to start with? No clue, no indication, no nothing! Well...exactly...you start completely empty! At first I seemed pretty good at it. The so called "beginners luck!". But after a while I noticed, I wasn't the complete "blank sheet" anymore! Memories of the feedback of previous targets started to interfere! Then something changed. I started to describe not the actual target, but the next target I would get! A precognitive RV-session! After five times in a row viewing the next target...I guessed...I allready knew the data for the sixth target and that was my description of the fifth target! I proved to be correct!
RV (Remote Viewing) is always double blind. No person knows what the target is, and so it is excluded that the information could have been obtained by any means than ESP. I then argued...but most of the time I do not know what my spontaneous ESP brings me...still I see things that later are confirmed. That is simmilar to RV, isn't it? Still it was not RV, because I had no intention of seeing things! With RV it is about intentional Viewing a Remote and unknown target! Besides RV-ing is done within a Protocol.
And what if I tried RV? Would my spontaneous psi get worse? Or would I be able to control it by practice? None of the RV-er could awnser that question. Some stated, that they became more sensitive after a lot of practice.
I decided I had nothing to loose, and gave it a try! But where do you start...if you have got nothing to start with? No clue, no indication, no nothing! Well...exactly...you start completely empty! At first I seemed pretty good at it. The so called "beginners luck!". But after a while I noticed, I wasn't the complete "blank sheet" anymore! Memories of the feedback of previous targets started to interfere! Then something changed. I started to describe not the actual target, but the next target I would get! A precognitive RV-session! After five times in a row viewing the next target...I guessed...I allready knew the data for the sixth target and that was my description of the fifth target! I proved to be correct!
2007/08/04
The Bee on my Desk
While writing this, there is a bee sitting on the edge of my desk. I'm looking at the bee...sitting next to me. And it looks like it's looking back at me. I feel like I could trade places with it. I'd be the bee...and the bee, would be me.
I take a look at it...closing one eye...the bee is in another place. At least it looks that way! When I open my eye and close the other one...the image seems to shift again. Yet... the bee did not move and neather did I!
So in what place is it realy?
Is my left eye correct? Is my right eye correct? Are they only correct when they work together, because in that way I can percieve dept? Is my mind's interpretation of the things I see correct?
With only my two eyes...I can percieve the bee in three differtent places!
Actually in four different places! Because if I close both eyes...and picture the bee...the bee can be anywhere! And I can even be the bee...looking back at me!
So... are my eyes decieving me? Or is this bee, while sitting there...in the mean time..everywhere?
I'm I the bee...or not the bee? And how could it be me?
To be or not to be...is still the question!
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